When things aren't going your way, what can you do?

There are times in life when, no matter what you do, things just don’t seem to want to go your way.

In the recent few weeks, I’ve found myself battling one difficulty after another, from a lingering cold that literally floored me to a personal challenge with one of my sons.

And it started a few days before I was supposed to fly to Cyprus to spend some quality time with my mother and hopefully be inspired to write more.

A few days before I was supposed to fly, I got a cold which really made me feel weak and tired, not something you need when you are supposed to be packing and then flying 2,000 miles!

But if I’m going to be honest, I had regretted the decision to make this trip to Cyprus a long time before; it was once again one of those knee-jerk ideas that I act upon and often end up regretting – and now I felt trapped by that decision.

And as I so often do, I ignored all those feelings inside that kept telling me to cancel and cut my losses, and I still literally forced myself to the airport! And this is when the adventure really started!

When I got to Luton Airport, I discovered that due to a recent fire in one of the car parks, taxis had to drop you off at a point that was at least 10 minutes' walk to the terminal. So with this big suitcase, I dragged myself towards the terminal.

Okay, not a big deal, I made it, checked in, and headed towards the lounge to wait for my airplane. So far, so good; no flight delay, and as scheduled, we began to board. Then I got to my seat to find that the person sitting next to me, without disrespect but in all honesty, needed one and a half seats, which meant not only was I not feeling well yet, now I had to squeeze myself into the edge of my seat for the next five hours!

But I continued with the journey; after all, what other choice did I have? And it turned out the man next to me was a nice guy, so I had to just make the most out of the situation.

Then I got to Cyprus and went through the normal procedures to then make my way to pick up the car that I rented. However, due to extra security outside the airport because of the problems in Gaza, the car rental companies were not allowed inside, so I had to find them!!

Eventually, I found them and was driven to pick up my car.

At this point I’m tired and missing the tranquillity of my home. Then I’m told, 'your car is ready, and we’ve upgraded you to an automatic!!’ – okay, but I asked for a manual, and although I’ve driven an automatic before, I was nervous about having to remember how to drive it, in the dark without a satnav, to a place I was unfamiliar with.

But the only other option was to ask for a refund and then get stranded in the middle of nowhere! So, I took the car and drove to Nicosia to the apartment that I had rented – now this was the icing on the cake. The apartment was dated, cold, and the bed was like trying to sleep on a log!

Now I knew that I should have listened to those warning signs!

I put up with the discomfort for two nights, then decided to book an earlier return home, and felt immediately relieved to know I only had a few more days before I could just come home – except the universe wasn’t finished with me!

The next day I got a phone call from my eldest son that my middle son had an accident, and that was it; I booked a flight home the very next day.

6 Lessons I've learned from experiencing things not going my way:

Be kinder to yourself – yes, the first thing I learned from all of this is to stop being so harsh on myself. Yes, I made an unwise decision to leave my home, disrupt my life, and my business flow, but what good was my constant self-berating? There was, of course, something behind that decision, and that was what I needed to understand. What made me want to travel to Cyprus, especially since I was there in the summer and didn’t enjoy it?

Letting go of the next thrill – this entire experience has taught me the value of embracing a quieter, more leisurely pace of life. In fact, I've come to realise that I've grown weary of constantly pursuing the next thrilling adventure.

Trying to be someone you’re not – my visits to Cyprus unearth so many memories that I find myself entangled in conflict. On this trip, I endeavoured once more to inhabit the persona I embodied over two decades ago, the woman who resided there. Yet, I've undergone such profound transformation that little remains of that former self. Despite my efforts, I no longer belong in that place.

And I wonder if there’s any point at all of trying to hold onto someone that no longer exists?

True Happiness - I now recognise more than ever that the life I've built for myself post-divorce brings me profound contentment, albeit not of the exhilarating kind; it's a more serene and settled form of happiness.

Listen to your inner voice - And I guess I've finally learned that I must listen to those inner voices that act as my guides but that I often ignore. I've decided that from now on, instead of impulsively acting on those whims that seem like great ideas at the time, I will at least sleep on them before taking action. I will ask myself deeper questions, such as: What am I trying to avoid by distracting myself with some shiny new idea?

Don’t fight it - You see, everything wasn’t going wrong. In fact, everything was going exactly as it should because the whole trip was never meant to happen. Had I paid attention, I would have known that fighting against what is not meant to be has a ripple effect, it is the law of the universe!

Fortunately, my son is slowly recovering, and I’m glad I was here to take care of my youngest granddaughter for a couple of days while he puts his life back together.